What do you do when a client asks you for a referral to your most qualified competitor?

If you are devious, you could sabotage the inquiry. Simply refer him to someone who will struggle to meet the project requirements, presumably making you look good by comparison. When the ill-prepared competitor fails, you might hope that the client learns an important lesson. Specifically, that you are the one, only and best photographer to meet his needs.

If you respond to the client honestly, with the best-qualified referral, you breach a natural defense. You give away access. In this business, access is the equivalent of a State Secret.

You will have provided your competitor with a personal introduction to your client, effectively opening the door for that competitor to steal your business.

Either you damn your soul or your livelihood, so what is the best decision?

Many photographers would find this a difficult choice. Not Conrad Gloos, a fine photographer, friend and mentor who has twice addressed this dilemma in the thirteen years that I’ve known him. In both cases, he passed significant assignments on to me. The first time he had a scheduling conflict and I shot the entire job.

On the second occasion, that which produced these portraits on the left, the project was too big for him to complete within the allotted time.

Conrad possesses a clarity that dispels anxious thinking. He could see where the devious path, that of undermining the project’s success, would really lead. First, the client would suffer. If we photographers undermine our client’s prosperity, then they will be unable to hire any of us in the future. Second, our standing would be diminished if our clients could not trust us. When they rely upon our recommendation, we are unavoidably linked to the outcome. Third, whether or not we provide a referral, clients are fully capable of discovering our competitors’ names. Finally, in choosing the subversive path, we would have passed up the opportunity to strengthen our bond with this client. A good client relationship is the wellspring of future opportunity. It spawns word-of-mouth. Two character attributes led Conrad to the right answer. First, he is an ethical man and he attracts ethical people. Not only did he owe his clients the truth, but he also knew that I wouldn’t steal his clients. Second, Conrad is secure in the work he produces. He knows it is quality work. Confidence projects stability. When one is self-confident, it makes others comfortable and receptive to investing their trust.

The fusion of ethics and confidence creates a force field, a social gravity that pulls in like-minded people. These people collect and bond with an unspoken understanding. As their number grows, so does the potential for what they can accomplish.

It turns out that these two qualities, ethics and confidence, also go to the heart of what makes a good portrait photographer. In turn, they lead to strong portraiture.

A great portrait is not simply a strong photograph. When someone postures for the camera, that is a form of photographic performance, not a portrait. A great portrait is genuine; it shows a real person at his or her best. A great portrait is about making the subject comfortable in revealing him or herself. A great portrait is about finding beauty in who the subject really is.

How does a portrait photographer do that? By infusing into the portrait-making experience qualities that make the sitter comfortable. By winning the sitter’s trust. By disarming fear. By

making the experience painless. By modeling integrity. By respecting what the sitter reveals. By coming to the session with both the knowledge and resources necessary to make the best possible photograph. In a nutshell, the portrait session must be real (ethics), and the photographer must earn the sitter’s trust (confidence).

This is not always easy to do. This second project that Conrad shared with me was particularly challenging because of the pace at which portraits had to be made. The client was a national accounting firm. They needed portraits of actual employees for a recruitment brochure.

We photographed across the entire spectrum of their staff, from maintenance workers all the way up to the principals. All of the photographs were made over a two-day period at one of their corporate offices. I made the portraits you see here while Conrad photographed groups. (Photographing several people interacting ‘naturally’ is one his specialties.) My portraits were to emphasize the individual employee. Our scheduling was so tight that it allowed for only so many changes in shooting location. Typically, I worked just around the corner from Conrad, and I had to squeeze as much as possible from each setting. I wracked my brain to get at least eight different compositions out of every location. I did not want to make cookie-cutter portraits.

I photographed sixty-four portraits in a two-day period. Like clockwork, another four people would appear for their portrait sessions every half-hour. We got backed up and spilled into our

break time, eliminating our opportunity for rest. We got visual relief by moving to a new location, but that also meant tearing down the lights, transporting our equipment and setting up all over again.

The real challenge, though, was to respond to every new sitter as a unique person. That was the only way to get the best portrait, even if in the brief eight to ten-minutes we shared. This assignment was a creative marathon. Conrad’s faith in me paid off. My pictures integrated seamlessly with his in the brochure, and he kept his client.

“The amazing thing,” he later told me, “is that you managed to make so many different portraits. That is a real accomplishment.” Had anyone else said that, I would have simply acknowledged the compliment and moved on. But hearing those words from him made me reflect for a few moments.

My mind flashed through much of the wisdom Conrad had shared with me over the years. When I finally said ‘thank you’, I meant it for much more than commenting on this work.